When I finish my book club book, generally with a few days to go, I generally fill up the gap by grabbing an old Granta or something else with short, self-contained pieces. This time round I found myself clutching an old copy of P J O’ Rourke’s Holidays in Hell, featuring a piece entitled Seoul Brothers, in which appeared:

“Korean sounds like ack-ack fire, every syllable has a primary accent: YO-YO CAMP STOVE HAM HOCK DIP STICK DUCK SOUP HAT RACK PING-PONG LIP SYNCH!!!!’

It also features one hell of an opening para: